"See, I will send you the prophet Elijah before that great and dreadful day of the Lord comes. He will turn the hearts of the fathers to their children, and the hearts of the children to their fathers; or else I will come and strike the land with a curse."

We live in exciting times. Where God is reigniting His church with a message of truth and of grace- a message of "no compromise" in believing that He is the "way, truth and life", and a messgae that Christ is the "unmerited favor" of God. He is breaking down legalism and dismantling arguments for lawlessness either. He is not for both. He is the God of truth, and of grace. You have him- you have both grace and truth, you cannot have one without the other. Like waves after waves of renewal from Heaven, God is raising up a Church that knows its Gospel, having a reasoned faith, and sending them out to display the relevance of the Gospel, as the Gospel always has been, to a broken world.

Like I was telling nessa yesterday, to be holy, to be the church...is to be "called out". Just as much as we love the idea of sacred unity within the Church, we must be ready to be forsaken, rejected and even persecuted for the relevation God has given us, for our lives and our society. No true sacred unity is achieved without the cost of discipleship. What is the cost? It is to get up from our fishing nets and boats and follow the Master when He comes calling. It is to forsake the glory of yesterday's encounters and experiences and methods to receive the new encounters, experiences and methods. It is never to say, "the old is better".

Back to the verse in malachi. Basically, if you understand the verse literally, it means that God in the end times (which by the way I believe is now) would do a special work in restoring families. He wants to bridge any and all "generational gap"- by this I don't only mean, gap caused by preference or culture, but a gap caused also by deeper sources like lies, abuse, indifference, ignorance etc. i think that's why people like nessa is so passionate about raising Godly families one day... It is God's plan for this hour.

Metaphorically, I believe it is speaking about spiritual fathers and sons. Who are your spiritual fathers? I am not just talking about your church leader, or the Christian leader you are under. A spiritual father is a godly christian that others imitate. So when you imitiate a godly Christian, you are in fact his spiritual son or daughter. When you influence someone in godliness, he is your spiritual son or daughter. You and he are in a "spiritual family".

Do you know that spiritual modelling does not only happen between Christians...? You might be an example of godliness to a non-Christian- though the latter does not understand what godliness is, he is attracted nonetheless to the reflection of God in your life. Why would God say that in the last days, that He will bring a revival of "spiritual modelling"?

One- spiritual modelling reveals God. Two- The Church in the post-modern world is perceived as irrelevant by too many in our generation...society is meant to model after the Church in its morality, meaning and motives. However, society has marginalised the church, and the church has isolated itself- because both do not realise how important modelling is, and that the call to be the Church is actually a call to model Christ to the world. But God is going to bridge the "gaps" caused by insensitivity and apathy on the part of the church, and the "gaps" caused by offenses that the world has done to the Church...these strains on the relationship between the Church and the world will be taken away in this hour so that the world would understand the relevance of the Church and have its hardened heart broken, and that the Church would have compassion and model Christ correctly.

Calvin, Luther, Wycliffe, Bunyan, Tyndale...men of great faith...or rather men who knew a great God and thus became great... men who understood the sacred call of God's church- no more hiding for them, it's time for His glory to be revealed in human society...

Oh God, would you give your Church today a double portion of the anointing on these people's lives... And cause us to feel and see your world and culture the same way as they did. God, Call us once again... for how can we preach if we have not been sent, God!

It's incredible, and yet strangely familiar, that the truth is- civilisation and history belongs to Him. And to be given an explanation of how language, technology and culture have all at one time or another been shaped by a love for the Word of God is simply mind-blowing... This is the power Jesus has given His true Church- the keys to the kingdom, to bind and to loose things from heaven to earth! This is the power that can change a city. Friends, let's not be ignorant anymore. Let's take off the blinds of pride and unbelief from our eyes and let the Spirit show us and empower us to live so that His kingdom can down here on earth.

When we think what we are supposed to accomplish, think Christ. Think of the word of God incarnated in a human body...And then think of the same word inside you and me this moment. As He is, we must be- in this world.

What does this mean? One, it means that we must reckon that "it is no longer I that lives, but Christ that lives in me"- so that we allow Christ to live through us. That is how we can then accomplish what that verse in 1 John says... "as He is, so are we in this world"- how do we know if this is how He would act in this world... unless He is living it through us? This means living a lifestyle of prayer... where our mind and spirit is constantly turned over to God, till they becomes possesed by His spirit... In order to do this, we must also realise that the word of God is not meant to be retained as good knowledge in our heads... it is actually like 'dynamite' that will explode somewhere deep in our spirits as soon as we hear it, and immediately provoke a change in any and all aspects of our lives. When we have that kind of expectation towards God's word, the word will (i.e. without exception) take on flesh. Meaning you will find yourself doing it, instead of just hearing it.

This is our finest hour...   

A thousand faces, a thousand lives... that was what I felt when I passed the busstop at Dhoby. And then shaun made a comment about how so many people's lives have become conformed to a continual pursuit of wealth... And he questioned, "would all the degrees matter, if war broke out?"

And I think he is right. Let's all learn to put things into perspective. And for Christians, we ought to live in terms of eternity.

But at Dhoby I felt like... this is the City He knows! This is the battleground for souls! This is the world His eyes roam through and fro, watching over every soul. Most importantly, this is the City He has called us to touch with His grace.

On a less serious note, today was GREAT! Haha. Thank you justin, aaron, jorji, shaun, tim and amirah... you a07 pple truly make the class a worthwhile place to be in! The class is not just four walls- it is contained inside you guys.... HAHA.

Friends, what is happening in your world now? Are things out of order and messy? Are you afraid, worried or feeling condemned for mistakes that you have done? In the midst of all these things happening, guess what? He never left you.

Sometimes it's hard to "feel" Him... but it is in those moments that we exercise faith, which is the belief that He "is" (which means He never changes, there is no "past tense" with, everything the bible has said about Him counts right here and now) and His hand is reaching out to you.

Stop. Consider that the God who formed everything out of nothing is reaching out to you. Breathe hard... and allow the air to contain His love and desire and flowing passion for you. The fact is, He never left. He doesn't withdraw His hands of grace because you have messed up... He isn't shocked or afraid or vengeful for the mess you have created by your own choices... He already knows about it... yes there is a side of God that burns against sin... but that is "God's strange work" which means the natural thing we think God does to sinners which is to condemn them is in fact not natural for God... He doesn't will this for you. That is why Christ didn't come to "condemn the world..." (the world is already condemned because of sin) but that through Him the world "might be saved".

Stand my friend in front of the Cross today... and Consider "how wide, how deep, how high... is the love of Christ" poured out for you at the foot of the Cross. It is enough to give you eternity... which is a life brand new... a new lease of life... an uncorrupted life... a purposeful and ordered life... all that you, the 'true' you, ever wanted is in this life that is found in Him.

Come, come my friend... look into the Savior's eyes. And worship Him.

Forever.  

Thank you Faus for your wonderful company yesterday!

Hm, I think this is one of those friendships that I call "core" ones... friendships that one must give thanks over and over again...as long as they last! haha. And yes, faus, if you are reading this- the "best is ahead of you"! hahaha.

And thanks rahman for being the ever constant joy giver to my life... you truly are a best friend indeed... haha... I wouldn't mind having such a subconscious... HAHA. Except, don't use those 'blasphemous' remarks. =] May you always know that you can inspire people...the world needs this! hee  

The poem below is in thanksgiving for all friends, those who have added "salt" to life! haha

Poem Dedication to all friends

The broken past
Always taunting, never ceasing
Challenging me
Have I truly come far?

Have I truly climbed over the walls-
To my dreams' fulfilment
Have I become all I said I could be?
The past murmurs,
As if plotting a kill

With their findings
Hard, cold facts of life's realities
You haven't got far
they explain in tangible proof

How can I look up at the Sun
And still smile
Despite these critical voices?
I know their fallacies,
But there are many voices

In moments of despair
I hear the footsteps arriving
At the door
And the concerned faces
That know their way in

They are gentle with their steps
Knowing that they thread on torn and broken
Passages-
The results of an explosion that had happened
Inside the heart

And In quietness they wait with me
till time and faith heals the brokenness
And then they laugh with me

And remind me of an eternity without tears

Truly God you are faithful

Today met a few familiar faces... hahaha...

What I feel surprised at is that when I saw  Jolene...my brain took so long to get out of a shock before it reacted again... haha.. I am just surprised that just not meeting my sec sch mates for about 2 yrs now would mean that I have in some way forgotten how to respond to them...

I truly pray that all of those whom God has graced to cross my path will be blessed...and honestly I think I will be blessed manifold more than what blessing they can receive from me. Friends of the past and present, you all have been an encouragement to me in some way... thank you!

Hm, j2 is fleeting... all the friendships made.. all the experiences I had... all the magnificence... all the teary roads... what has all these come to?

It has brought me to praise the One who continually save me, and who has called me out of darkness into His marvellous light! It is Him, that life and everything else is worth the living.

But I really really want to meet up with as many ole companies by the end of this year, before a new chapter begins... I was just thinking... what analogy would describe memory the best?

A circuit board. Because you have to constantly let the current flow... revisit the love, experience it again... if not you might not like the "electrocuting" feel! HAHA.

PLEASE READ "THE SPIRIT OF THE DISCIPLINES" by DALLAS WILLARD if you have time... you are free to borrow it from me anytime... just find it, and read it... I don't think you will put the book down and remain unchallenged in your thinking and in your spirit... this book is sitrring stuff... i mean, one of two books I've read this week that "stretched" my thinking and opened my spirit to God's wonderful truths about life and ourselves.

Just something sooo exciting I got to QUOTE it here! haha.

Something about theology...

He writes, "We shouldn't be frightened of the word 'theology'. Admittedly, it has kept some pretty dry and dreary company, and we may be tempted to leave it to "the experts". But it stands for something FAR TOO IMPORTANT to each of our individual lives and to the communities in which we live for us to shy away from it. Theology is a part of our lives. It's unavoidable..a thoughtless theology guides our lives with just as much force as a thoughtful and informed one.

...an informed theology must eventually be in the service of ordinary people, and when it is, it will have a great impact for good. Every Christian must strive to arrive at beliefs about God that faithfully reflect the realities of his or her life and experience, so that each may know how to live before Him in His world.

That's theology!"

How can you read smth like this, and not JUMP AS HIGH AS YOU CAN, and SHOUT HALLELUJAH, AMEN! HAHA!

This is the starting line of one of the True Worshippers' Song...or the starting question...And the bridge goes on to reveal how much God is too him...And then the chorus is a prayer to "love (God) more" and for "each and every breath" to be one that carries a longing for Him...

And this is the question I always return to. Do I believe that the God of heaven and earth truly love me? Do I dare believe...what audacity...to believe that to prove this love, He bore a Cross across Calvary to save me? Because, if I truly believe that, how can I not be changed? How can any part of my soul not "bless His holy name"? How can any part of me remain silent at such a sacrifice...

Unless I haven't really known the depths of Jesus Christ...the depths of grace and forgiveness found...

Maybe that's why I am constantly amazed at the Cross... Because I haven't amazed at it enough! And yet, how can I ever be amazed enough... Never, not for all eternity, or eternities to come!

And yet the God who bore those nails in His hands and feet calls us each and every moment in life to wonder at His sacrifice, and to be lost deeper and deeper in that glorious work! It is this pursuit that should become our lifelong pursuit, our lifelong hunger. Because it is this love, which is God loving us first, and the continual abiding in it that changes our lives from the inside out.

Oh God! Oh God! I can't understand this love enough, or be lost, or amazed in it enough...but God, I truly want to experience it and enjoy it and savour it more and more and more...God, this is who you are. You are Love. And we cannot and should not ever go beyond the Cross...or Grace.

Friend, stand strong- in the Grace of God...it is not an idea, or a theological viewpoint, or a feeling... it is the Person of Jesus Christ!

Lead me to the Rock... that's higher than I!

Thank you God. For being faithful, for being kind, for never-ending compassion, for unlimited grace... for Arms that's always open... Open for me to embrace, open for me to cry in, open for me to complain, open for me to rest a weary head...

Open for me to throw my messy life into...

Thank you God. More faithful than a brother, more loyal than a close friend, more generous than any benefactor in this world, Grace himself crossing path with me.

I didn't go, you came. I couldn't move, you moved to my world. It was your world actually, but I tore it apart. But you came to heal it. Because you are healing, you are salvation, you are grace. It is in your nature to bless undeserved people, it is in your nature to give sinners chances after chances, it is in your nature to favor the weak, the broken, the tax collectors- those who break your heart. And yet when they call, you always hear. And even before they call, you knock on the doors of their hearts.

Everlasting, your light will shine when all else fades... never-ending, your glory, your worth, your significance goes beyond all things. Because you are the worth in everything good, you are the significance in everything that is truly significant in this world. You are truly, our all in all.

God, one life to learn one great lesson...a lesson to be continued in eternity...the lesson of Grace. That God, ultimately, is Grace and Truth. And that forms the basis for every other lesson in this life, and the next- that all worth comes from this God. And everything that is good. Because He is Good.  It's impossible to know grace without knowing truth, and it's impossible to know truth, without knowing grace.

When I knew who I am, I also know my only hope is God. So, lead me to the Rock that is higher than I... lead me to Christ...I need Him. My life is hidden in Him. It is no longer I that lives, but Christ that lives in me. I accomplish nothing, I can accomplish nothing apart from Him... I am dead...can the dead walk? Can he talk? Can he live? No, I walk in faith- which means I live out of the GRACE of God.

So, at the end of the day, the only lesson we must learn through life, is "Ask in faith, and you shall receive in Grace." You receive God himself.

"Unto US a child is born, Unto US a Son is given..."  

Alleluia, Alleluia, Alleluia
To Christ the King

He has taught me to rest in Him, as the Hope of the world, the Hope of my college, the Hope of my life. He is the Light that will always shine. He is Christ, He is unending never changing grace.

He has taught me to be grateful, for this land. For This City. To love it like He does. It is and will be a city where the lost can hear about Him. And of salvation. And enter it.

He has taught me about the power of His name. It is a power that can break all other powers, all blindness and pride and indifference, it is the only power that can redeem a whole spiritual environment so that conversations and actions are transformed by the fear of the Lord. And finally, people see the glory of God because it becomes real to them- redemption always exposes the glory of God, and they will believe in Him.

To Christ the King, the hope of all the earth rests assured in Your great love.  

This is strange. God is truly a God who builds block by block, stone by stone, and as long we are built upon the cornerstone...the journey is just gonna get more exciting.

Just awhile God, I've been asking God to "redeem me" more each day...for those who are not used to this theology, redemption is a one-moment thing that happened to you when you are saved... but it is also a life-time thing where God's word transforms you from glory to glory into His image. And that was what I was asking God for...to be changed.

This whole year started with one cry for me... the cry for greater wonder of God in my life. Which gradually, I realised, was a cry for deeper and more meaningful discipleship with Him. And so that was always my cry- to be changed. Because I believe, as we are caught up in the wonder of Him, we will be changed to be like Him.

And that is the only way to be changed- to be caught up in episodes, then moments, then a lifetime of awe at who He is!

C.S.Lewis made this wise statement on those who would seek God, "when you (truly) know what God He is, whether He is is no longer a question."

Judah Smith said, "When you look into those nail-pierced hands and feet, and into those burning eyes, and his hair like wool, your only response will be, 'I give my life as a living sacrifice'!"

And then today, boom- revelation came! I became overwhelmed with a great unease when I woke up. As if, I was walking the wrong way, or caught up in the wrong things. Then I heard two separate messages, and read an article that changed the morning for me.

I tuned into a sermon by John Piper (which I heard before) but today I was so desperate to get right with God...I wanted to return to His way... I wanted to know "what's wrong?" Where, Lord, have I deviated? I listened desperately. And the message, surprisingly (haha, with God, is anyth ever surprising?), was on our response to the Gospel. Piper was preaching that we should fear God and hope in Him- as our response to the Gospel.

And he was challenging the listeners to give up any trust in anything other than God... (interestingly, Corne Bekker said the same thing in a sermon I heard the night before)... esp the strength of man, our self-creativity, our potential, our ability... and in what we can do and create... and to put Him as our only Hope.

Then Phil Pringle came onto my handphone, and talked about "sweetening up our spirit" with the word of God, and how we ought to walk "not in the way of ungodly", and how we ought to allow the Word to produce "reverential" fear in the attitudes that guide our life. And then I intuitively know, by the power of the Spirit, that I have become dependent upon self (what I can create... good communities...good fellowship...good friendships) and upon others (from whence I can get acceptance, worth, validation)- and I have not made God my only trust and hope. I have not feared Him. My attitudes were wrong- that was the reason for the unease when I woke up, and throughout the morning. 

Augustine is proven right, "The soul's unease is the work of the spirit." ANd then I realised, if I wanted to be redeemed, I must be convicted for my sins.. I must be judged in order to be redeemed. Christ, representing us on the cross, was judged by the Father- and then raised up, after God's judgement was appeased. And surprisingly again, I was reading a devotion by Andrew Murray who speaks so profoundly that "judgement" could be the very instrument of God's mercy to us... Think about it- when God dealt with Annias and Saphirah who lied to the Holy Spirit (in Acts), more people believed as a result. The fear of the Lord results in life. Life is found in fearing God. 

And then, to make the morning even more dramatic, Max Lucado steps in- with His devotional- and gives us a picture of the Samaritan woman after her conversation with Jesus... she quickly rushes off into her town, and begins telling the first person she meets about this man etc... and guess what, Lucado suggests, is left at the well? 

It is the jug she brought there in the first place. That represents the  life of insignificance, Lucado explains, she has been living- and the well became a burial ground for something that day. Her insignificance was buried, and she ran with purpose now. 

And I realised that my feelings of "insignificance" (God, who cares about what I'm going through, and what I can do?) results from the fact that the Holy Spirit is convicting me. It's time, the spirit seems to say, for you to die to that old life again. That past life- the sin- controlled life- is in essence, insignificance. Because, God is significance- His very essence, His very life, is meaning and order and purpose. He spoke, and gave "order" to the "chaos" of this universe at creation... and His life creates... apart from God, there is no creative power or purpose or meaning, only aimlessness and senselessness... and I was feeling like I did because I had adopted attitudes that were opposed to Him, and in that, I rejected the life of significance... but reverted back to everything insignificant... and everything apart from Him.

It was His mercy and grace that made me feel this way, so I can repent, and receive His life- in essence live significantly again. He reminded me...that when I die one day, people would say that I have been reduced to insignificance because my body will lay cold in the ground (all functions dissolved)... but that is untrue... because the body itself right now is already defined by insignificance, its very essence opposed to God, opposed to life... it is a body cursed by sin, and failed in terms of law... but that day, the truth is- the real me, my immortal self, the spiritual self can never be more significant for I become wholly one with Christ, who is the essence of life and meaning. In this He was telling me that whenever I feel insignificant, it is because I've reverted to living in the old flesh, the sin-cursed one, and I was no longer walking in the Spirit. The way to go is to "bury" or "die" to the old self again, and receive His life.

Wow. What a revelation! What grace given to us... God, thank you for the early birthday present... You are the best! I give my life ever and ever, in faith, to honor this- the Savior King!