Let's start at John 12:20-26

"Sir we wish to see Jesus"- some Greek worshipers said.

Philip came and told Andrew, and in turn Andrew and Philip told Jesus.

And then the word that no one really like- unless it turns something bad into good... "But" appears!

"But Jesus answered them, saying, "The hour has come that the Son of Man should be glorified. Most assuredly I say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it produces much grain..."

You know what, Jesus' reply showed that he was concerned about something. It is unlike Jesus to refuse discourse or ministry to people- especially to those who came to visit him (remember Nicodemus?) Yet, in this passage, Jesus seems to reject the invitation of these Greeks. Why?

I think Jesus was more worried for his disciples than for the Greeks. He had to correct something in their mindset.

Why had the Greeks come? Before this passage- the whole town was in celebration upon Jesus' arrival... news had been spread that Jesus had raised Lazarus from the dead! Here was a man- who could defeat even death! These Greeks wanted to seek Jesus out.

I even presume that the reason Philip told Andrew before telling Jesus- was that he was too excited about the many visits Jesus was receiving... People from everywhere wanted to see Him... they had formed an opinion about Him... He was a miracle worker, for one, and he could be the Messiah.

Both Andrew and Philip must have thought that this was it- that Jesus had come to this earth to perform these signs and wonders... and here and now- they were involved in witnessing the greatest crescendo of human history. This was the climax. Jesus was going to be crowned... because He served miracles.

Then Jesus replied- "I am not glorified yet- but the hour is coming..." This should come as a shock to them. Because they were thinking- this is the glorification... isn't it?

Then Jesus said something even more shocking- "unless a grain of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains alone...but if it dies, it produces much grain." You mean the glorification has something to do with death? What kind of glorification is that?

In essence, Jesus was trying to say- in my opinion- that all that I have done, the resurrections, the healings, the mulitplication are not the climatic moment of my time here. They happen- to create in you a thirst for the kind of life in which these things are foretastes of. When you receive my life, there is healing for your body- even if you are not "healed" in this life, you will have resurrection like dear Lazarus. When you receive my life, you live in the dimension where all your needs can be supplied by me- that's mulitplication. So all these miracles are foretastes- or a taste of- the LIFE that I have come to give you.

That is why Jesus goes on to say, "He who loves his life (the corrupted, the unredeemed, the sinful life of a man) will lose it, and he who hates his life in this world (do not cherish it, disown it) will keep it (preserve, redeem it) for eternal life (yup, that's MY kind of life- according to Jesus)."

Jesus is saying, don't be excited dudes! That all these Greeks are coming to Me... because they hear of signs and wonders... they've the missed the point- don't miss the point too, guys! I came to give you more than signs and wonders- I came to give NEW LIFE. I came for one climatic act of love- the Cross. It is on the Cross that I will "draw all peoples to myself". When you don't understand My cross, Jesus is saying, you pursue the signs and wonders- but if you understand it, you will pursue Me.

And hold on for a moment- your pursuit doesn't start with you... it starts with Me. V.32- "I...will draw all peoples to myself." You feel like you are pursuing me- when you look at my Cross- but guess what? It is my beauty and my worth that draws you to Me! Don't boast in your longing for me- boast in My longing for you.

I am the pursuer!

That, my friends, is Grace. Grace means I wasn't prepared, nor was I ready, nor was I pursuing  Him- but Grace, in the person of Jesus, was already pursuing Me through the Cross!

And you know what? Have you heard an unbeliever friend said this before- "Oh, I actually would love to have someone watching over me... I just can't accept this" ?

Do you know even that line is motivated by a longing for God... a longing for the Christ...a longing to be set free by His sacrifice... a longing that exist because Grace is already knocking at the person's door?

This is eternal life- that we know Christ, and the One who has sent Him... what is salvation? It is allowing yourself to be caught up in the arms of this pursuer called Grace- and then wrapping all you have and are around Him.

Don't ignore the pursuit of Grace on your life.

The title in my bible for Luke 19 is, "Jesus comes to Zacchaeus' House"- it's a poignant title. Who comes to whom?

And the ending is just as poignant- Jesus said, "Today salvation has come to this house, because he is a Son of Abraham; for the Son of Man has come to seek and save what is lost." Who comes to whom?

In the end, if we call ourselves believers in this Gospel of Jesus Christ, we are ultimately saved by Grace. Not a concept, not an idea, not a principle- but a Person. The Person of Jesus Christ. We didn't come to Him... Remember Jesus' words to His disciples who asked him, "Who then can be saved"?

And Jesus' reply? "With men... it is impossible (unattainable, unaccomplishable, bound to failure)... but with God (who has revealed himself through Jesus, as the person of Grace), ALL THINGS are (have become) possible!"

You don't go looking for salvation- it comes for you. Jesus comes for you. By the way- He is already at the door... go read Revelations...

Behold (wait a moment, glimpse this, this will blow your MIND).... I (Jesus, the son of man, the personification of Grace, Salvation himself- literally because He is the fullness of God who is Jehovah, the redeemer) stand at the door (of your heart) and knock (hear the beating already?)... If anyone (anyone!! I don't care what mess you have made in your life, I don't care what your past is- I already know it, I don't care where you are right now- and what dire states your lifestyle has led you to! Anyone is included in this invitation!) opens the door, and let me in- I will (not might, not I'll think about it, not "you got to go through a few steps" and "do some stuff right first"!! This is certain!) come in and dine with him (not for a moment, but for eternity to come... not judge him by the way... dine- fellowship, commune, enjoy time together and each other... DINE!)

That's the invitation of Grace for you and I today.

Are we still trying to work for grace... Zacchaeus was trying hard- he climbed up a tree, tried to hide the fact that he was short when he had sooo many other stuff to actually hide anyway, so that Jesus would not notice his defect- his "short stature" as the bible puts it! But hear what Jesus says...

"make haste and come down, for today I must stay at your house."

Jesus says, errr... what are you trying to do? Impress me? Hm... ok, that's enough (that's quite funny of you)... we can't waste anymore time... you won't be able to impress me ,if I gave you eternity anyway!!! So just scrape that idea, come down, and receive me....Let's go dinner- I'm hungry!

I can imagine Zacchaeus goes, "What?" With a really shocked and awed look.

Yep, that's what Grace- the person of Jesus- will make you and I feel, when we try to impress Him... because the finished work of the Cross- with the OPEN ARMS OF JESUS ON IT IS EVER READY, WHEN WE ARE NEVER READY!

Guess what? Many a time, we try living like Zacchaeus after Jesus comes to His house... after that guy received GRACE... And we try living like him... giving to the poor (by the way that means ministering encouragement, comfort and warmth- emotionally, spiritually, practically- to everyone needy) and valuing people more than material possession... BUT WE FAIL TERRIBLY!

Dear friends, let us not try to live like that- let us RECEIVE JESUS and we WILL (for sure, guaranteed) LIVE like that... Because that IS the character of Christ- you don't work for it, you receive it and understand it's effect on your life.

Next time, don't say, "Oh, it's all in a day's work..." Let's start saying, "It's all in the Grace's work!"

WOW!

Haha... Just needed to say that... Just came back from a run- I ran 12:23 for 2.4 km! hahaha... Praise God, and did 3 chin ups... hahaha... God is reallyyyy amazinggg...

And thank the Lord for being with me for the 1st week of A's...

I agree with what wong said- this just doesn't feel like A's! As in... I'm not THAT stressed! HAHA.... I mean if A's to me were a life or death thing- maybe I would be... But I refuse to allow it to become that! HAHA. God is in control- and A's is not! HAHA.

Just wanted to encourage people out there who might find the season you are in dry, strenuous, or just tough... God is with you!! He is Grace!!

"What do you mean by that... benedict?" You might ask.

He is the Answer to your every pain, every trouble, every distress, every anxiety, every discomfort, every vulnerability, every weakness, every addiction... And He is the UNDESERVED ANSWER!

Meaning- we don't actually deserve Jesus... but He came to us anyway... ! You know, sometimes we think grace is just for the forgiveness of sins- but nothing can be further from the truth!!!

He is the LIFE of God... if you have seen Jesus, you have seen LIFE- because there is no true life other than the righteous life that is from God... and Jesus comess to pour HIMSELF into US- to breathe the LIFE of God into our dry bones...

And you need the LIFE of God just to exist- both physically and spiritually! And do you think you deserve that?? Definitely not- even if you were perfect like Adam was before the Fall, whatever you receive from God is still BY GRACE THROUGH FAITH! If not God wouldn't say, "the righteous (those who are pure) live by faith!"

Adam's dominion over his environment, his authority, his mandate, his power... were derived from the LIFE of GOD- given BY GRACE!

And how can we think that we can ever reach a "perfect" state where we are "worthy" enough to say that "I deserve this life", if in the first place... if God didn't think you into existence, we would not even be! We will simply be a negative- an absence!

Our presence- all that we have in this life and the next is BY GRACE!

So today, this GRACE is available to you today... especially when you come to that realisation that apart from Him, you can do nothing. Remember in one of Paul's letters- "For God opposes the PROUD, BUT GIVES GRACE to the HUMBLE." Therefore, let's not think we can bear the whole world on our shoulders ourselves... but let us humble ourselves before the Almighty, before INFINITY Himself, and ask in confidence- because of Jesus' finished work on the Cross- for GRACE to superbound in our lives... so that we can be refreshed, recharged, rejuvenated, renewed!

Don't try in your own strength to be in the centre of God's will- receive the GRACE and you WILL BE in the Centre of God's perfect will! In that WILL is EVERYTHING GOOD for You!

I'm pretty excited for all the close Christian frens I've met these past 2 yrs... Especially those that have been broken, moulded, re-molded, and shaped, and reshaped... haha... you guys are really looking like our Master! And I believe, with all my heart, that you guys are the post 21st century team...to take this city for Christ!

The world has seen great men and women of faith like Martin Luther, John Calvin, John Wesley, Jon Edwards, Charley Finney, Billy Graham... And my heroes in the faith who are still alive- Psr Kong Hee (HAHA), Judah Smith, Brian Houston, A.R.Bernard and Phil Pringle...

But I tell you, this century would not be over before they see God raise up each and everyone of these do great and mighty exploits in His name...most of us think the charismatic movement is wonderful and incredible... I think it's time for a NEW movement to arise... A movement that "no eyes has seen, no ears has heard and no mind has comprehended" will be raised up... What would this movement be?

Definitely a relational movement- people-centred- and definitely a movement where new theology will be written and outmoded and unbiblical theology will be identified... New theology that will become a blueprint for evangelism for the here and now, in this age... and most importantly, a Church that will learn to accept its call- to "partner with Grace" in truly engaging and saving the lost.

It has been easy for us to take for granted that people would believe our gospel and receive it... when we ourselves do not receive daily revelations, even moment-by-moment revelations of this message...and are not being changed and challenged by this message...and until we do, the world will not see the Church as the hope of God on this earth.

God I'm hurt, I'm weary... I don't understand- how can God be Life and yet Broken for men at the same time... I can't be confident when I'm hurting can I? God deliver me from my self- from the envy, strife and all that strives with who I really am in You. God I want to experience Your life in ALL of its fullness- God, I'm hungry... I really am... Show me Your way God! This world is not easy, in fact- I just don't see a positive me in it anymore... how can I be positive, when people have no sense of good anymore... they simply act how they want to act everyday... this is ridiculous... really Lord... touch me God, I need you.

"See, I will send you the prophet Elijah before that great and dreadful day of the Lord comes. He will turn the hearts of the fathers to their children, and the hearts of the children to their fathers; or else I will come and strike the land with a curse."

We live in exciting times. Where God is reigniting His church with a message of truth and of grace- a message of "no compromise" in believing that He is the "way, truth and life", and a messgae that Christ is the "unmerited favor" of God. He is breaking down legalism and dismantling arguments for lawlessness either. He is not for both. He is the God of truth, and of grace. You have him- you have both grace and truth, you cannot have one without the other. Like waves after waves of renewal from Heaven, God is raising up a Church that knows its Gospel, having a reasoned faith, and sending them out to display the relevance of the Gospel, as the Gospel always has been, to a broken world.

Like I was telling nessa yesterday, to be holy, to be the church...is to be "called out". Just as much as we love the idea of sacred unity within the Church, we must be ready to be forsaken, rejected and even persecuted for the relevation God has given us, for our lives and our society. No true sacred unity is achieved without the cost of discipleship. What is the cost? It is to get up from our fishing nets and boats and follow the Master when He comes calling. It is to forsake the glory of yesterday's encounters and experiences and methods to receive the new encounters, experiences and methods. It is never to say, "the old is better".

Back to the verse in malachi. Basically, if you understand the verse literally, it means that God in the end times (which by the way I believe is now) would do a special work in restoring families. He wants to bridge any and all "generational gap"- by this I don't only mean, gap caused by preference or culture, but a gap caused also by deeper sources like lies, abuse, indifference, ignorance etc. i think that's why people like nessa is so passionate about raising Godly families one day... It is God's plan for this hour.

Metaphorically, I believe it is speaking about spiritual fathers and sons. Who are your spiritual fathers? I am not just talking about your church leader, or the Christian leader you are under. A spiritual father is a godly christian that others imitate. So when you imitiate a godly Christian, you are in fact his spiritual son or daughter. When you influence someone in godliness, he is your spiritual son or daughter. You and he are in a "spiritual family".

Do you know that spiritual modelling does not only happen between Christians...? You might be an example of godliness to a non-Christian- though the latter does not understand what godliness is, he is attracted nonetheless to the reflection of God in your life. Why would God say that in the last days, that He will bring a revival of "spiritual modelling"?

One- spiritual modelling reveals God. Two- The Church in the post-modern world is perceived as irrelevant by too many in our generation...society is meant to model after the Church in its morality, meaning and motives. However, society has marginalised the church, and the church has isolated itself- because both do not realise how important modelling is, and that the call to be the Church is actually a call to model Christ to the world. But God is going to bridge the "gaps" caused by insensitivity and apathy on the part of the church, and the "gaps" caused by offenses that the world has done to the Church...these strains on the relationship between the Church and the world will be taken away in this hour so that the world would understand the relevance of the Church and have its hardened heart broken, and that the Church would have compassion and model Christ correctly.

Calvin, Luther, Wycliffe, Bunyan, Tyndale...men of great faith...or rather men who knew a great God and thus became great... men who understood the sacred call of God's church- no more hiding for them, it's time for His glory to be revealed in human society...

Oh God, would you give your Church today a double portion of the anointing on these people's lives... And cause us to feel and see your world and culture the same way as they did. God, Call us once again... for how can we preach if we have not been sent, God!

It's incredible, and yet strangely familiar, that the truth is- civilisation and history belongs to Him. And to be given an explanation of how language, technology and culture have all at one time or another been shaped by a love for the Word of God is simply mind-blowing... This is the power Jesus has given His true Church- the keys to the kingdom, to bind and to loose things from heaven to earth! This is the power that can change a city. Friends, let's not be ignorant anymore. Let's take off the blinds of pride and unbelief from our eyes and let the Spirit show us and empower us to live so that His kingdom can down here on earth.

When we think what we are supposed to accomplish, think Christ. Think of the word of God incarnated in a human body...And then think of the same word inside you and me this moment. As He is, we must be- in this world.

What does this mean? One, it means that we must reckon that "it is no longer I that lives, but Christ that lives in me"- so that we allow Christ to live through us. That is how we can then accomplish what that verse in 1 John says... "as He is, so are we in this world"- how do we know if this is how He would act in this world... unless He is living it through us? This means living a lifestyle of prayer... where our mind and spirit is constantly turned over to God, till they becomes possesed by His spirit... In order to do this, we must also realise that the word of God is not meant to be retained as good knowledge in our heads... it is actually like 'dynamite' that will explode somewhere deep in our spirits as soon as we hear it, and immediately provoke a change in any and all aspects of our lives. When we have that kind of expectation towards God's word, the word will (i.e. without exception) take on flesh. Meaning you will find yourself doing it, instead of just hearing it.

This is our finest hour...   

A thousand faces, a thousand lives... that was what I felt when I passed the busstop at Dhoby. And then shaun made a comment about how so many people's lives have become conformed to a continual pursuit of wealth... And he questioned, "would all the degrees matter, if war broke out?"

And I think he is right. Let's all learn to put things into perspective. And for Christians, we ought to live in terms of eternity.

But at Dhoby I felt like... this is the City He knows! This is the battleground for souls! This is the world His eyes roam through and fro, watching over every soul. Most importantly, this is the City He has called us to touch with His grace.

On a less serious note, today was GREAT! Haha. Thank you justin, aaron, jorji, shaun, tim and amirah... you a07 pple truly make the class a worthwhile place to be in! The class is not just four walls- it is contained inside you guys.... HAHA.

Friends, what is happening in your world now? Are things out of order and messy? Are you afraid, worried or feeling condemned for mistakes that you have done? In the midst of all these things happening, guess what? He never left you.

Sometimes it's hard to "feel" Him... but it is in those moments that we exercise faith, which is the belief that He "is" (which means He never changes, there is no "past tense" with, everything the bible has said about Him counts right here and now) and His hand is reaching out to you.

Stop. Consider that the God who formed everything out of nothing is reaching out to you. Breathe hard... and allow the air to contain His love and desire and flowing passion for you. The fact is, He never left. He doesn't withdraw His hands of grace because you have messed up... He isn't shocked or afraid or vengeful for the mess you have created by your own choices... He already knows about it... yes there is a side of God that burns against sin... but that is "God's strange work" which means the natural thing we think God does to sinners which is to condemn them is in fact not natural for God... He doesn't will this for you. That is why Christ didn't come to "condemn the world..." (the world is already condemned because of sin) but that through Him the world "might be saved".

Stand my friend in front of the Cross today... and Consider "how wide, how deep, how high... is the love of Christ" poured out for you at the foot of the Cross. It is enough to give you eternity... which is a life brand new... a new lease of life... an uncorrupted life... a purposeful and ordered life... all that you, the 'true' you, ever wanted is in this life that is found in Him.

Come, come my friend... look into the Savior's eyes. And worship Him.

Forever.  

Thank you Faus for your wonderful company yesterday!

Hm, I think this is one of those friendships that I call "core" ones... friendships that one must give thanks over and over again...as long as they last! haha. And yes, faus, if you are reading this- the "best is ahead of you"! hahaha.

And thanks rahman for being the ever constant joy giver to my life... you truly are a best friend indeed... haha... I wouldn't mind having such a subconscious... HAHA. Except, don't use those 'blasphemous' remarks. =] May you always know that you can inspire people...the world needs this! hee  

The poem below is in thanksgiving for all friends, those who have added "salt" to life! haha

Poem Dedication to all friends

The broken past
Always taunting, never ceasing
Challenging me
Have I truly come far?

Have I truly climbed over the walls-
To my dreams' fulfilment
Have I become all I said I could be?
The past murmurs,
As if plotting a kill

With their findings
Hard, cold facts of life's realities
You haven't got far
they explain in tangible proof

How can I look up at the Sun
And still smile
Despite these critical voices?
I know their fallacies,
But there are many voices

In moments of despair
I hear the footsteps arriving
At the door
And the concerned faces
That know their way in

They are gentle with their steps
Knowing that they thread on torn and broken
Passages-
The results of an explosion that had happened
Inside the heart

And In quietness they wait with me
till time and faith heals the brokenness
And then they laugh with me

And remind me of an eternity without tears

Truly God you are faithful

Today met a few familiar faces... hahaha...

What I feel surprised at is that when I saw  Jolene...my brain took so long to get out of a shock before it reacted again... haha.. I am just surprised that just not meeting my sec sch mates for about 2 yrs now would mean that I have in some way forgotten how to respond to them...

I truly pray that all of those whom God has graced to cross my path will be blessed...and honestly I think I will be blessed manifold more than what blessing they can receive from me. Friends of the past and present, you all have been an encouragement to me in some way... thank you!

Hm, j2 is fleeting... all the friendships made.. all the experiences I had... all the magnificence... all the teary roads... what has all these come to?

It has brought me to praise the One who continually save me, and who has called me out of darkness into His marvellous light! It is Him, that life and everything else is worth the living.

But I really really want to meet up with as many ole companies by the end of this year, before a new chapter begins... I was just thinking... what analogy would describe memory the best?

A circuit board. Because you have to constantly let the current flow... revisit the love, experience it again... if not you might not like the "electrocuting" feel! HAHA.

PLEASE READ "THE SPIRIT OF THE DISCIPLINES" by DALLAS WILLARD if you have time... you are free to borrow it from me anytime... just find it, and read it... I don't think you will put the book down and remain unchallenged in your thinking and in your spirit... this book is sitrring stuff... i mean, one of two books I've read this week that "stretched" my thinking and opened my spirit to God's wonderful truths about life and ourselves.

Just something sooo exciting I got to QUOTE it here! haha.

Something about theology...

He writes, "We shouldn't be frightened of the word 'theology'. Admittedly, it has kept some pretty dry and dreary company, and we may be tempted to leave it to "the experts". But it stands for something FAR TOO IMPORTANT to each of our individual lives and to the communities in which we live for us to shy away from it. Theology is a part of our lives. It's unavoidable..a thoughtless theology guides our lives with just as much force as a thoughtful and informed one.

...an informed theology must eventually be in the service of ordinary people, and when it is, it will have a great impact for good. Every Christian must strive to arrive at beliefs about God that faithfully reflect the realities of his or her life and experience, so that each may know how to live before Him in His world.

That's theology!"

How can you read smth like this, and not JUMP AS HIGH AS YOU CAN, and SHOUT HALLELUJAH, AMEN! HAHA!